Monday, October 16, 2017

When you have to Parent your Parents, How to cope.

It's a fact of Life...our Parents age. They get to the point where they cannot do certain tasks by themselves, and this is so frustrating, both on their part and also from your point-of-view, their grown-up child or children. Everyone just wants things to go back to "normal" (whatever that is.) Let's just FIX what's wrong, so we can get back to our own lives and jobs and homes and pets. 

It's like this broken glass chime in the photo above, things are in such a tangled mess, it becomes almost impossible to fix. It takes TIME, something most of us don't have. And a lot of Patience. If your Parent is angry at their situation, you may find yourself on the receiving end of a lot of verbal abuse. No matter what you do, it is not good enough. The phrase " I don't know..." gets used a lot by your confused Parent. There are some painful decisions to make, and your Parent may have a different opinion on what should be done. 

Not making a choice IS Making a Choice.  I don't want to go into a Home. I want to stay here and live on my own. I am blind and cannot take care of myself. I don't want a stranger in my Home. The Home care workers are horrible to me. They are telling lies about me. And so it goes on. The situation becomes compounded when you do not live in the same City as your ageing Parent. 

Then there are the Parent's possessions. Your Parent has lost their independence, and they may feel they have lost control of their Life. A lot of their possessions have sentimental value to them. You, the adult child, have to help them get rid of their unused stuff. You've tried numerous times, and have merely shuffled the mess from 1 spot to another spot. From the adult child's point-of-view, you may have driven 5 hours to get to your Parent's place, and you have a few hours to clean and get rid of unused stuff. And you start tossing out any broken, unused, not-needed anymore furniture, knick-knacks, linens,  dishes, etc. Without asking your Parent. 
Have any of you been here, and done that? 

At night, another child is there helping the Parent, and Parent is frantically looking around for her favourite skirt, which is nowhere to be found. Probably got tossed into the pile for the Salvation Army. This little elephant ( a Baby gift for you when you were little), he got tossed out, so there you are, digging in the BFI bin, in the basement of your Parent's apartment, using her long grabber thingamajig. People passing by are looking at you a bit strangely. Sigh..... 

Anger ...helplessness....frustration...losing control....losing Independence......feeling lost and alone.....
becoming like a child again.....the Parent is the child while the Child becomes the Parent...Helplessness. 

Then you remember this saying from Robert Munsch, " long as I'm living, my baby you'll be."  And you wish it would all be easy, and that neither you (the adult child) or your Parent, would have to go down this long road ahead. 

But after all, illness and Death are part of Life, and that's just the way it is. What are your experiences with parenting a Parent? What strategies have helped you along the way? Comment below, we would love to hear from you! 
If you would like to send a Sympathy Tribute, call us at The Camellia, we deliver in Thunder Bay and surrounding area. The Camellia, 30, Hacquoil Rd. Slate River, On

handmade wreaths at The Camellia

Sunday, August 27, 2017

Baby Boomers are smart people. Don't underestimate them.

Baby Boomers...there are a lot of us in the World. This term refers to babies born in the post World War 11 era, generally born between 1946-1965.  Opa Overmeer is a Baby Boomer. Sometimes Opa Overmeer gets attitude from people.....and it irritates the hell out of him.

Baby Boomers control a vast amount of wealth, and anyone dealing with this demographic would be wise to tread a bit more carefully around them. A lot of them own their own homes ( mortgage-free), have a few sportscars, and may own a second property in a warm climate. Statistically speaking, most Canadians become wealthy by inheritance. So if you piss off  Baby Boomers, guess what? It's going to a Homeless Dog Shelter, or a Hospital. Most Baby Boomers have worked their butts off trying to get ahead, and they don't want to see all their hard work go to persons who seem to have no ...(you finish that sentence...)

Jolly Harbour, Antigua

Do not assume that they are computer-illiterate.

This applies to Bank Tellers, Investment advisors...., Cell phone companies, Internet providers, and so on. Especially don't talk to them ( a baby boomer)  in a condescending tone of voice in public...YOU KNOW...YOU HAVE TO GO ON THE WEBSITE AND ADD ...(blah.blah.blah) AS A PAYEE.

Note:  NOT ALL BABY BOOMERS ARE DEAF. Don't be surprised if they make a scene in public when you treat them like a stupid ***.

They have lived longer than you, and have far more experience. Learn from them. 

If they are asking you questions, stop pretending everything is ok. Listen, and learn from them. They were young too, and made mistakes. Why not learn from their mistakes? What does everyone want in Life....To be happy, healthy and enjoy Life. That is what they want for you, and your children. Blue skies ahead...we all want that.

blue skies

Baby Boomers do not want to live with non-stop DRAMA. 
If your Life consists of making up stuff, and inflicting misery and blame on others, don't expect that anyone is going to put up with it. If you have trauma you went through as a kid, go get some help. Do NOT inflict misery on other people's lives. Your Life is your own responsibility. 
If this is the way you want to live, then expect that Baby Boomers will distance themselves from you. What does this mean? No big, Family get-togethers. No invitations to go along on Overseas holidays. A horrible division of the Family may take place. This one is not speaking to that one. Polite tolerance. Baby Boomers may move to another city or Country.
Who wins in this scenario? NO ONE.
Who gets hurt? EVERYONE. Especially the little ones, who get torn apart in this mess.

Baby Boomers value every minute do any of us know how much longer we have above ground? Don't waste a Baby Boomer's time. 

Baby Boomers may be struggling with their own health problems. These problems may require vast amounts of time spent doing yoga and physical fitness, stress management, eating healthy, etc. They do not want to become a burden to their kids. They may be actively trying to stay healthy. They aren't there for you when you decide you need a Babysitter within the next hour? Everyone benefits from routine in their lives, so try setting some specific times for them to spend with their Grandchildren.

the Camellia

Robert Munsch book

Baby Boomers care deeply for their kids, however, there comes a time when they can no longer fix problems their kids have created. Everyone's Life is their own responsibility. So the next time, you feel inclined to get angry at a Baby Boomer in your Family, try thinking about things from their point of view. 

If you are a Baby Boomer, and need help with Home Decor, or learning how to be computer literate, call us here at The Camellia , at 30, Hacquoil Rd. Thunder Bay, Ontario
p 807-475-3551

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Summer flower arranging - foilage bouquets are Easy! Design Classes at the Camellia

How many of you have an abundance of Foilage right outside your door but you are not sure how to create a beautiful foilage arrangement? This post is for on this link and read on...

Ivy plants can be trimmed to provide long lengths of trailing greenery....or you can work the Ivy plant, pot and all, into your design. Arranging Flowers is a great stress reliever....creating something beautiful out of foliage in your backyard makes you feel so....well. like a Florist in Napa Valley creating something fabulous for an outdoor gathering! 

What can you use? Cut Hosta leaves from your Garden. 


Have Hops vines..? Use them to create a trailing effect in your design. 


Birch leaves, maple leaves, tamarac branches are all beautiful in a foilage bouquet. 

Farrow and Ball Thunder Bay

Here we are drawing Inspiration from potted greenery outside #FarrowandBall's Toronto showroom. Love #FarrowandBallPaint and want to buy it in #ThunderBay? We can order it in for you here at #TheCamellia. Come in to see the latest Farrow and Ball Designer colour deck, which shows you actual paint colours. 


Don't forget to use mosses gathered from your yard, in your Foilage Bouquet! Interested in learning more? Attend a Floral design class at #theCamellia. 
Check our website link for upcoming classes:

The Camellia, 30/32 Hacquoil Rd. Slate River, On 
p (807) 475 3551

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Lavender Play dough: how to keep kids occupied on Summer holidays

Summer Holidays love them, Parents fear them. Add days and months of non-stop Rain, and you wonder how you will keep your sanity until school reopens in September. Here is a link to a Lavender Play Dough recipe: 

Great play area for kids for hid-and-go-seek

Of course, if the Sun is shining and it's not raining, kids would love to play hide-and-go-seek in this Tree. Everything is better when the sun is shining. 

lavender at The Camellia

Lavender is well-known for its calming effects, this type is Spanish Lavender. It's the only type which will grow and bloom all Summer in Thunder Bay, it does not overwinter, but dies off in the Fall. 

Lavender Thunder Bay

Bees love Lavender. If you love Lavender, visit our store, The Camellia. We carry dried Lavender from Vancouver Island, and Lavender products from  Neob Lavender Farm in Niagara-on-the-Lake. 
Don't you just love the smell of Lavender? 
The Camellia, 30, Hacquoil Rd. Thunder Bay, On, p (807)475-3551

Sunday, June 18, 2017

How to use Vintage/Yard sale finds in your Home: A peek into Bachmans Spring tour 2017

Hello You..! You know who you are,   HGTV and  DIY network are your favourite TV channels. You probably spend some time on Pinterest and come away with a million ideas of someday-I-would-like-to-do-that. It looks so easy! One of our favourite places for Ideas is the Bachman Idea house in Minneapolis, MN. Click on this link to see the Spring Tour 2017. 

vintage at The Camellia

We also have many ideas at our store, The Camellia, at 30, Hacquoil Rd. Slate River. Here is one of our yard sale finds, a metal chandy, it's waiting around to get fixed up and put to use as a store prop. You can see it being part of a Vintage Wedding photo shoot.

cottage paint project at The Camellia

A pair of wooden shutters waiting to get cleaned up and painted with Cottage Paint, which we sell here at The Camellia. It's going to be some shade from our water-based palette - blues, aqua, turquoise and driftwood. Going to add character to a Coastal look in a staircase.

Cottage Paint project

Finding an old brick wall in your building is like hitting a small gold mine, it adds so much patina to a room., or you can paint a brick wall with our Urban line of #CottagePaint. Head into our store, The Camellia to see our metallic sample chart. Click on this link for more information:

Cottage paint Urban at The Camellia

Cottage Paint project at The Camellia

vintage wedding at The Camellia

Old typewriters make a great addition to a study or Office area. We have this beauty for sale in our shop. It would be lovely in a Wedding ceremony on the signing table. 

painting mirror with Cottage Paint at The Camellia

Old frames add an antique touch to a modern Bathroom. Look at the mirror on the wall, this is the  before of the white mirror in the front, its original finish in an Antique Gold. The frame in the front has been painted with Cottage Paint, giving it a fresh, clean look.

Visit the Bachman's Idea House in Minneapolis, MN. Need help with using Vintage Finds in your Home or Cottage?
Visit The Camellia, at 30, Hacquoil Rd. Slate River. Ontario.    p (807)475-3551

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Fifi O'Neill, Waterside, Coastal & Flea-Market Style.

Do you love Antiques, and Country, & Rustic...Then follow Fifi O'Neill. She mixes all of these styles in an effortless manner. For those of us who are afraid to follow our Style because it's not in vogue at the moment, maybe it's too shabby, or too ....or too...
Watch the video below....!

Garden flowers at The Camellia

Fresh flowers are a beautiful addition to any room in your Home...these are especially beautiful as they were just picked from the Garden -  French Lilacs, Iris, and Daylilies. What are you planning to grow in your Garden this Summer in your Garden? 

Farmhouse style at The Camellia

Rustic style over the years has seen Roosters, Pigs, Rabbits and other creatures come and go as decor items. Here at The Camellia we have various #Upholstery weight fabrics for your DIY projects, such as recovering the seats of vintage dining-room chairs. Make sure you save the old fabric you take off to use as a pattern to cut your new fabric. 

Cottage Paint

Here is the Before photo of these antique solid wood chairs which we picked up from a second-hand store. 

chair painted with Cottage Paint

Here is the same chair painted with Cottage Paint - colour evening sky. What a difference!

painted furniture Cottage Paint

A neutral Grey Linen on the seat completes the restoration. We used Anchor grey Cottage Paint on the drop-leaf table. 

turquoise cottage paint

This Turquoise Cottage Paint just yells out Coastal and Water and Lake. 

Look around you...anything can be repurposed, this paddle idea for a headboard would be so great in a Camp by the Lake. What have you got laying around that can be repurposed? Head to our store The Camellia for #Cottage/chalkyPaint to redo your old furniture pieces. 

cottage painted chair

Did you know that you can paint Upholstery with #CottagePaint?

Hawaii sea turtle

Get your Inspiration from this beautiful  sea turtle...and we do have a lovely colour in Cottage paint called Sea Turtle. 

The Camellia

Here is a sign we are working on - using Cottage Paint colours : Beach letters done in NAPLES BLUE, Coral painted in DRIFTWOOD, Mermaid painted in SEA TURTLE, and the background is COTTAGE WHITE. If you are decorating in a Coastal theme, you cannot go wrong if you include these colours in your decor. 

Bouckville antique fair

Follow #FifiONeill on Facebook, and be sure to read her books also. Stop in and see us at The Camellia for Coastal style and Waterside decor.
The Camellia, 30, Hacquoil Rd. Slate River, On.
Open Wed. Thurs. Fri. Sat. and Sunday.
p (807)475-3551

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

So Happy that it's May in Slate River, The Camellia.

The Camellia

So happy that it's May ! May is our favourite month! 

Is it true? Is the Winter finally over? Last week there was a horrendous Ice/Snow storm which was  very hard on the poor songbirds who had  returned thinking it was Spring - especially the Robins. Three days of cold, and ice and snow cover....some of our Robins did not make it. Today it 's a beautiful partly cloudy day with some Rain, and here's what it looked like on this evening's walk. It feels like we are the only place that's not Green yet.

Hacquoil Rd. spring flowers

The Marsh marigolds are starting to leaf out, as are the fuzzy Willows, and the birch and poplars are laden with pollen. Buds are puffing out on our trees, and we start to hope, to imagine not wearing Winter boots, or coats or hats. What's the weather like where you are? Is it nice and warm yet? Sandal weather? 

The Camellia

We have been busy making Willow Wreaths - these are a lot of work, you need to collect many branches to make just 1 wreath. A willow wreath makes a lovely #Mother's Day Gift. 

I sleep with Dogs pillow

Just arrived are these lovely Pillows   I sleep with Dogs!..   How many of you sleep with your doggie (s)  on the bed? 

The Camellia

This is a cute Inspirational Banner, also a great Mother's Day Gift. Visit The Camellia, at 30, Hacquoil Rd. for great #Mother's Day Gifts!  No time to visit? Shop on our website , and we will deliver your item. ( delivery charges apply).  We are Open Wed. Thurs. Fri. Sat. and Sunday. 
p (807)475-